and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
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Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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