one might say we're banned from that church
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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