Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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