what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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