Its about making memories worth repressing
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize