After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Boobs speak an international language.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
