The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
