i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Banned from zoo.
Again?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize