oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
A+ Viking dick
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
