I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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