Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize