I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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