Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
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