Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Randomize
