Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
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