Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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