Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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