Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
