Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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