wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
