We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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