You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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