So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
