I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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