it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize