the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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