Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
