I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
