just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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