Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize