Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Apparently you make a good broom.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Randomize
