So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
This is classic penis vs brain.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
