I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Randomize
