Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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