last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
