You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize