Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
