It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
