Texts From Last Night

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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.

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  (859): Your vagina is a self cleaning oven. http://tfl.nu/z5bn
  Replies (11) Good night (991) Bad night (513)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.

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  (917): Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college. http://tfl.nu/0xig
  Replies (24) Good night (781) Bad night (3198)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.

  (1-804): View more from Virginia

  U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha

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  (804): Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat. (1-804): U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha http://tfl.nu/198a
  Replies (4) Good night (2113) Bad night (473)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life

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  (817): they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life http://tfl.nu/g989
  Replies (8) Good night (3270) Bad night (815)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.

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  (636): you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me. http://tfl.nu/k5hc
  Replies (4) Good night (6474) Bad night (831)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I did the walk of shame to church this morning.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  hooker boots and all?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.

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  (313): I did the walk of shame to church this morning. (734): hooker boots and all? (313): Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway. http://tfl.nu/9ht9
  Replies (14) Good night (7124) Bad night (941)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones

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  (985): I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones http://tfl.nu/jfi7
  Replies (11) Good night (3561) Bad night (1086)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.

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  (250): At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here. http://tfl.nu/zp01
  Replies (7) Good night (785) Bad night (2210)
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  (310): View more from California

  Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?

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  (310): Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow? http://tfl.nu/9403
  Replies (5) Good night (1571) Bad night (458)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.

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  (816): Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is. http://tfl.nu/ytcu
  Replies (5) Good night (2600) Bad night (348)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Somehow he made it really romantic

  (503): View more from Oregon

  He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.

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  (541): Somehow he made it really romantic (503): He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me. http://tfl.nu/2g7n
  Replies (7) Good night (1292) Bad night (704)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer

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  (705): this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer http://tfl.nu/chqz
  Replies (2) Good night (520) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day

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  (623): I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day http://tfl.nu/dbnn
  Replies (6) Good night (301) Bad night (644)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.

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  (780): In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far. http://tfl.nu/dhez
  Replies (4) Good night (530) Bad night (209)
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  (315): View more from New York

  It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere

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  (315): It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere http://tfl.nu/b71m
  Replies (0) Good night (308) Bad night (190)

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