She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.