If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
