We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
