Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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