I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
