Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
