the new term for farting is butt boxing.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
