I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize