PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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