Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a dumb baby whore.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
The adults are the big ones right?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize