i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm too high and old for this...
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
