All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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