that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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