and you said cock pushups were impossible
No stitches, just platelets and will power
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is