You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.