The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
there was a trapeze. enough said
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
the gays at disneyland are vicious
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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